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A close, longtime male friend came to town and we had coffee during the day. We've never had a romantic connection or were sexually involved. I told my
Can a wife have platonic male friendships?


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A close, longtime male friend came to town and we had coffee during the day. We've never had a romantic connection or were sexually involved. I told my husband what I was doing afterwards during a phone call during the workday. He's the jealous type for sure but I thought this would be acceptable since it's during the day & I'm telling him what I'm doing. Later that night he is frustrated and upset with me (I'll mention that my previous phone call to him earlier that morning was me crying about him not giving me enough physical touch, but these coffee plans were made in advance of that). He accuses me of cheating, at least emotionally, if not physically. I'll mention the two of them have hung out a couple times previously, but didn't exactly gel because of personality differences & my husband's feeling that my friend had an attraction for me. How can I maintain a friendship with this male friend and respect my husband's feelings? Any advice or experience most welcome! UPDATE: Thanks redditors for the advice, stories, questions & comments! Definitely helping me examine the situation and figuring out how to move forward. Lots of questions on why I didn't disclose before or how I'd feel if the roles were reversed - I would be ok with it. Husband spends one on one time with girl friends, even at the house, even will nap in the our bed together, only telling me after they're over. I'm ok with it because I know they're friends. I'm only mad about it because I know HE would be upset if I did the same. I think that's why I didn't feel the need to disclose beforehand, although I see how that would have avoided a lot of grief here. UPDATE 2: Things cooled down. I apologized for not discussing this BEFOREHAND and I think he realized that this is not a threat to our marriage & also similar to how he interacts with female friends. So a few days later, friend is leaving town and we plan to have lunch. So BEFORE I invite husband to join us (which he couldn't for work) and I ask if he's ok with me going, which he is. All went well. Thank you Reddit Marriage community for your insight & experiences. Very helpful in helping me understand my situation & husband's perspective.













Seeking a male friend